just woke up and guess what i didnt go to church. =( gotta get some scoldings already. slept at 2 am this morning. at least i feel a lil refreshed now. but well well. not very because i am still not very sober now. i drink very fast. haha. funny. tt's the weird part. i am going to school tml and that's really dreadful and i'll flung the bio mock since i didnt study when everyone is now chioging for the 20 days or sth prelims?? what about me. some slacker. great. i decided to study and end off my O's this yr just to get rid of stupid nothings. im not brainy nor clever just because im and 4e6 ok. why dont u guys look at the mediocre results im getting?? its so 'good' now. haha.in order to let mr lim my form teacher to see 42 GRADUATES THIS YR. i decided to give him some face.so tt is to continue studying. giving me with no other choices, stupid.i dont care wad grades im getting finish it and go ITE. HAHA. and yea giving me some attitude? guess wad. talking to me at the school gate so nice huh? and its like wad everyone's looking at me with that stupid look. as in. what happen ar? why is si en there. and why that teacher is scolding her? not scold but lecture to put it in nicey terms. yay.dont ever try calling me stupid again ok. i have my dignity. i just feel like talking back to him at the point of time. but i didnt. cux im just in a rush la. to meet you wei and pastor evelyn. i made so much wasted trip ok. just to get this stupid 'lecture'. its just crap anw. i didnt get anything in my ears. if i hadnt tell anyone what im going through right from the start on the 8th of JULY nothing of such will even happen. at least i am so much better and i will be si'en that u guys noe. dont call me si' en now. cux im not already. i've changed i think. wahaha. ok so on fri. there are many things to say. but i shall not mention them here.

so ytd the co flag day thingi. its really stupid ok. here my 5 juniors are putting in all their effort and guess what. their tin cans arent filled even to a half. i am really just so disappointed with the people around.obviously not from our section though im disappointed with some of their ATTITUDES WHICH TOTALLY SUCK. well as they dont even see the efforts in them. its ridiculous. i hate it. and there goes other flag days going on too. and btw. its woodlands. what could we do there? its not bout cello/bass not doing well btw. why should we let others despise us?? its just so unfair dont u get it? if you're sincerely from this section. i dont think you'll feel that way. why should we let other sections to despise us? think bout that. we've come so far. from a section without any good skills. being suan-ed and we're not as good as some top schools like TCH, NANYANG,DUNMAN HIGH. and so on. but well. now i dont even hear this for a few yrs during my stay at scco. dont you feel a sense of achievement? i dont think we should let the efforts of our very very good old seniors to waste. they've brought us so far. the 2 of us will noe. namely me and jo. we've come thru the many thick and thins. just that u guys havent gone thru it. its not the amount of money which is in the tins. its the effort that counts. i am the one who saw that ytd. which i haven seen on thursday when i met the section. they're just so diff? they arent slacking btw. thurs was sort of a slack. but NO. on sat it wasnt. its the effort that came in. guess what i noe what effort really means now. so just reflect and think about that. DESPISE US? NO!.think before making any comments. I TREAT ALL OF YOU AS MY FRENS AND JUNIORS. from any section.I TREAT U ALL WITH UTMOST RESPECT AND I DONT WISH ANTH WOULD HAPPEN AGAIN. AS A SECTION YOU ALL MUST STAY UNITED. NO MATTER WHAT IT IS. ALTHOUGH SOME PPL WILL NOT. EVEN JUNIORS THINK THEY ARE BETTER THAN ME IN SKILLS. HAHA. I DONT HAVE TO SAY ANTH.

just to mention some stuffs. its not wrong or right to think that you are better than me. i can say that you are better than me at times. but remember what u said. this is of no respect. well ever since sec1 i came in to cello/bass. all the seniors knew the skills i have and even mr poh. but how they treat me? right from the start. that's sec1 basic skills. where i have to learn everything afresh. that' s being humble. and im great i did that. and learn with all my heart. and that's why im always learning and improving in every aspect. mr poh once said. the 2 of us learnt without any problems and that he dont need to teach us like some idiots. as we take up fast mayb that's cux we have music backgrounds? yea. but it doesnt mean to have that we will be good. its the effort and though that we put in. yea. so from then on. i learnt as i picked up and yea i became better but i just feel im not good enough. having juniors being better than me, its better cux i noe where i stand. haha. anw. i dont wish to say how good her skills are. but its better if you just keep ur mouth shut thinking ur so great. even ppl think im good. i dont even say a word or brag around thinking im so good. just be humble, pride comes before a fall. if i rmb correctly. brain not functioning as it is. due to too much of drinking and what soever. haha. mel asked me to go ite with her and pei her smoke that day. lol. just so funny.

im still very weak now. came home like half drunk though i could still walk.but everything's just spinning la. im a lousy drinker. hees~ and slept all the way till now. yea. all i should say is. im already hopeless.im so glad.