pon-ed school today. well not really. as my head was super heavy this morning. so i decided to sleep a lil more just to get myself prepared to school. but i couldnt. so i told my sis to go to school first and not wait for me. and off they go and im off to sleep again. when i woke up, its already 12pm. whoa. and its due to the non-stopping vibrations from my handphone. wahaha!! my bestie msged me and there are a few from him. he thought i didnt reply. well im sleeping. just as you've guessed. im sick! and my heartburn came back again. oh no.. i couldnt take it. its seriously pain. it's like your heart is going to burst or sth? yea. so did some stupid stuffs at home like packing my sec4 stuffs to pass to my juniors on friday.
met joson to register for our cello exams. it's a long process. that's when i know why my piano teacher doesnt like to do such stuffs. ahah. mr poh is lazy too i guess. so he told us to register our exams on our own. well, after all the tedious stuffs we went to pool at marina square. joson was really good today. at least his mind did work. he suggested going to esplanade after everything. well some ppl said he is damn lousy. yar right. im worst okays!!! though i won the first haha. im shocked with my pooling skills today. maybe im just trying to vent all my anger into something and so it turned out i could play well. sighs. nvm. im stressed up with it and i just dont wanna think about it. i just wanna break free from that boundary. gossiped bout CO and stuffs.
heys. to joson(bestie), i wonder if i did make a fool of myself at marina, aha, kind of shock u again i guess. with those stupid tingy. it's not exaggerating ok!!! it's really true and it did happen. im just re-acting the same scene to you. just that i couldnt get that gay voice in me. wahhaa. catch up with ya soon again and the others.
off i go again. i wish i could be happy and jubilant all the time.i dont wanna be in a world where there's just sorrows. how i wish someone could understand me.
MONSTER is here.....
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C R U S H
by David Archuleta
I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know
Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?
See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever
Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know
Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
CRUSH!!!
potter puppet pals!
:D
P R O F I L E
me myself and i :D
BIENVENUE!
You are at MONSTER's BLOG!!!
To enter the MONSTERRICCC's WORLD...
Pursuing a Diploma of Banking and Financial Services
at Ngee Ann Polytechinc
NP strings
Year 1 student
Music fanatic
A pianist and cellist
020790
Once an Acs-ian ( arts and science student) should say a mix of both
Ex ACCO cellist. Loves her Cliques - the LMAOs(consisting for 2 NJ, 3 AC, 1 NYJ & 1 PJ)
The ACCO people
Class of TF04 in NP
Bestie - Joson
Fader turned Sand - Jackson
Girl that's always there - AnLi
and basically anyone who's always there or secretly there for me.
F I F T E E N
RANDOM FACTS
RANDOM FACTS
well, i am 18 years old, aren't i?
SPARKS OF EVIL..
This shall be left blank.
T O D O L I S T
13/10 FTT and many more?
T A G B O A R D
yakkity yak yak
RANTTSSS
9:54 pm - Monday, February 26, 2007
11:30 pm - Friday, February 23, 2007
im seriously down these few days. and i think i've gone a little insane for some instances. i cant take this any longer. it's bringing me pain and it hurts me a lot. well, sometimes i do wonder why my life is totally a mess and others are smooth sailing. sighs. ever since a long time ago, i drank again. i wont ever drink unless there's something which is seriously wrong with me. i hate being set in such a state and it brings me to an end of everything. my world is like crashing down every now and then. with so many problems pilling up- firstly my family. with my freaking stubborn sisters, they think they're so much wiser than me. use all sorts of vulgarities to scold me. whoa. so damn cool huh. for goodness sake, think before u speak. especially infront of relatives. and it's during chinese new year. show some respect when you're firstly at fault! i wonder how my mum can stand you both. with both your idiotic attitudes, her life will be shorter i tell you. and its always my fault right.? please. reflect upon yourselves first. i contribute so much more to the family than you two. both of you just know how to do silly stuffs. i agree i did too. i do such stuffs when im seriously in depression and they're all of some good reasons. unlike the both of you. just get lost from me. i dont wanna talk to you. bringing me so much probs is enough to me already. pls spare a thought for your mum too.
secondly, i think that being in a relationship sucks totally. why should i get into it in the first place? i regretted every single stuff i've been doing. i do things that hurt myself and the people around me. someone tell me the reason why??? i shoudnt have tried. well, maybe im searching for that someone who could really understand me and take good care of me. but it doesn seem to go in the right way i guess. looking back at my past relationships, they're not good ones either. it always end up with some major prob in me or its the other party, sighs. i cant handle all these on my own. it's tiring for me. im exhausted already. please give me a break will you? i've came this far ever since last yr after the major break and i know i've been through alot. all my frens and family and so on do know about it. its really tough on me. how long did i take to recover from the emotional damage i had? i've cried too much and it affected me in many areas. it's really hard for me to pick myself right from the beginning. i wonder why i'm treated this way by him. i think i'll treat it as a break for me already. since i've done sth that i shouldnt have. im just not sane that day. bringing myself upon it. sighs. sighs. sighs.
life's a misery for me! i wanna get out of this. it's killing me.
if you do know, you're hurting me alot. im treated in a way that i dont mean anything to you. i've been wrong into accepting you. i shouldnt had done so. we should be frens after all. and not a different status. it seems that im worst than a friend to you now. the way u treated me before we're together is totally a great difference comparing to now. i've been trying to move on with life and seek a new one. i guess i couldnt do it. it's another time for me to get myself into sadness. argh! i dontwanna cry anymore. it's been long since i've cried. are you worth my tears? i thought you could be the third guy in my life i could cry for. but ever since a few days ago, crying for you. i felt that you're not the one i should shed a single tear.
thank you wenna for hearing me out too. i wont get myself drunk. dont worry.
secondly, i think that being in a relationship sucks totally. why should i get into it in the first place? i regretted every single stuff i've been doing. i do things that hurt myself and the people around me. someone tell me the reason why??? i shoudnt have tried. well, maybe im searching for that someone who could really understand me and take good care of me. but it doesn seem to go in the right way i guess. looking back at my past relationships, they're not good ones either. it always end up with some major prob in me or its the other party, sighs. i cant handle all these on my own. it's tiring for me. im exhausted already. please give me a break will you? i've came this far ever since last yr after the major break and i know i've been through alot. all my frens and family and so on do know about it. its really tough on me. how long did i take to recover from the emotional damage i had? i've cried too much and it affected me in many areas. it's really hard for me to pick myself right from the beginning. i wonder why i'm treated this way by him. i think i'll treat it as a break for me already. since i've done sth that i shouldnt have. im just not sane that day. bringing myself upon it. sighs. sighs. sighs.
life's a misery for me! i wanna get out of this. it's killing me.
if you do know, you're hurting me alot. im treated in a way that i dont mean anything to you. i've been wrong into accepting you. i shouldnt had done so. we should be frens after all. and not a different status. it seems that im worst than a friend to you now. the way u treated me before we're together is totally a great difference comparing to now. i've been trying to move on with life and seek a new one. i guess i couldnt do it. it's another time for me to get myself into sadness. argh! i dontwanna cry anymore. it's been long since i've cried. are you worth my tears? i thought you could be the third guy in my life i could cry for. but ever since a few days ago, crying for you. i felt that you're not the one i should shed a single tear.
thank you wenna for hearing me out too. i wont get myself drunk. dont worry.
im finally updating people!!!
12:27 am - Thursday, February 08, 2007
heys. im like finally here again. i practically dont have the time to blog everyday or something. im super duper busy with all the tutorials. ahha. but most of the time i spent time copying them. It's actually the time i spent going out to shop, pool and so on and yea talking on the phone with those few people- you should know who you are, like till dawn?? yea and then i'll be super late for school and go for detention or just pon school. hahas. im bad right? a bad example for small kids especially. yep. my bill's bursting i guess. conference with so many people everyday with my handphone. plus no free calls at night. woots. im gonna be dead after chinese new year. oh well, dead like this FRI, O LEVELS RESULTS. i'll definitely cry!!! argh. told him bout that. and he said dont think too much. lol. wei. its not your results what dude!!! haha. hope he could pon sch just to accompany me for that day. lol. nahx i shant be that bad. he's having like final year exams or sth now i guess. not very sure but it's some major exams for poly right? hmm. i was feeling super down actually. cause he didnt call me la. and dont reply my msg!! like wth. he's been like this ever since i've known him but well. he does call me everyday. and we talk super duper long. so this is how it contributed to my darn heavy eyebags! i think it has doubled already. looking at them it makes me high!! i need something to cover it up. well i dont know how we would turn out to be but i hope it'll be alright. just like what he said in his first msg as a boyfriend to me. yea. so i'll just let nature take its course and be happy with whatever i have now. be contented with it gal!! lol. and to my dear fren zi wei. cheer up. he's not the only guy on earth. you can have aveil.. he's not attached now! so go for him. lala. had quite alot of fun with my class and i'll definitely miss the times we crap and we're going to pon later on in the morning. climb out of backgate and go pool. hope we succeed. lol. i've been trying to pon. and i've been absent for too many days. and im famous for it. yea. cool huh.
i'll blog again some other days. and i'll start to copy many tutorials again and again. it's never ending. i wonder how well i will do. i dont want to see some lousy grade on it! well i gotta blame myself for that. beats me for wasting time last yr into some stupid freaking stuff, argh! and i'll be celloitic.no such word i guess. pract all the way for my exam pieces and scales. gosh. stressed up life.
but with you around i guess i'll be the happiest gal. =) cheerios!
i'll blog again some other days. and i'll start to copy many tutorials again and again. it's never ending. i wonder how well i will do. i dont want to see some lousy grade on it! well i gotta blame myself for that. beats me for wasting time last yr into some stupid freaking stuff, argh! and i'll be celloitic.no such word i guess. pract all the way for my exam pieces and scales. gosh. stressed up life.
but with you around i guess i'll be the happiest gal. =) cheerios!
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A R C H I V E S
wasting my life away
October 2004
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A F F I L I A T E S
the people...
MORE MADNESS TO COME..